ringin' in the new year

Now is the time for contemplation, no? Well, here are the random thoughts going through my head.

My break was good because it was relaxing. I ate a ton and slept a ton. But it was sad because I was solo. With no siblings around and with parents allowing me to sleep in till all hours of the day, I didn't have much reason to get up in the morning so I didn't do too much. But I did stick in a couple trips to Seattle, a couple really good hangouts with friends, and good hangouts with my family. I got in lots of watching Seinfeld and House too, haha. And now I am ready for school. I'm ready for structure, purpose, work, things to do, and people, definitely people, especially this one person. But I'm not super excited about this weather. I was freezing all break b/c my parents keep the thermostat WAY low but holy cow, it is 20 degrees colder here than back home and I am sad about that. But it is good to be back. :)



Even though crappy things happened last year (economy going putz, car accident) it still feels like a really good year. I feel like I'm going to look back on 2009 with fondness. I already do. It was fun and I was happy for most of the year, which is so much better than 2008. So I'm very much looking forward to starting 2010 with a good outlook on life.



Speaking of 2010, it's my year! The year of the tiger! Holla for all those born in 1986. :) The theme song of the year is "Eye of the Tiger" and every time I get down I'm gonna pump that shiz uuup and dance around like Rocky. Oh, I need to see Rocky sometime soon. No, I've never seen it before. So yes, I'm a poser for using that as my theme song. But I'll un-poser myself soon! Anyways, I'm hoping for and going to work towards a rockin' year full of accomplishments and self-fulfillment and happiness!!!



I am super tired right now. But I actually slept last night which is good. I haven't slept well the previous 3 or 4 nights so I'm glad I'll finally get on a regular sleeping schedule. But it means I'm going to be super tired today. Oh well, that's what you get. :)



Happy New Year everyone!

uneasy

i feel strange, uneasy, like something is missing or broken and needs to be fixed, or... just... weird. is it the lack of schoolwork? is it wanting to know what my grades are? or is it something else entirely? maybe i know and i just don't want to admit it to myself.

eye of the tiger

do you know what's awesome? this time next year i will be planning and celebrating Christmas without the doom of finals hanging over my head. how great is that? i'll be able to decorate, shop, bake, etc. with more money from working full time and with more time from not having school! oh, glorious day!

in the meantime, i have one more final left until FREEDOM! i'm way nervous about it though... this semester was not as good as others, i think. although i know i've said that before and been pleasantly surprised. please, please, let my grades pull through one last time! ok well if it could happen again next semester too... haha.

Happy Christmas everyone!

sad songs.

i love sad songs. but they make me sad. but once i start, i cannot stop, listening and listening until i am so thoroughly saturated with emotions that i'm dripping in it.

it takes a bit to snap me out. is it normal/bad that such music affects me so?

i have been in the strangest mood today. in and out of happiness and anger. why why why

i finally finished my internship today. i printed off a billion pages of my portfolio and got it bound. it looks dang good. i'm so glad it's done, although i'm nervous about my grade. dr. thackeray seems kind of picky. but oh well, it's OVER. i feel pretty good about it. i'd like to think i made a difference. according to the after surveys we did, we both increased knowledge/awareness of the law in BYU students by 10% and decreased the number of those who regularly text and drive by 10%. i'd say that's pretty significant, sir! yep.

and if you read my facebook you'll know that my op/ed that i submitted to the daily herald (utah valley newspaper) got printed in yesterday's paper!! yes, i'm very excited--i mean how many people can say they're published? i hope lots of people read it and got to thinking about texting while driving..

i've decided to take genetics instead of chemistry. i can now apply to the university of utah, northeastern in boston, oregon health sciences university, and a few schools in new york and virginia, possibly. i'm really excited about it... east coast would be amazing!!! let's concentrate on getting in first. checklist:

-GRE--study study study and take it in april or may
-letters of recommendation--i'm thinking my boss at the health center, my microbiology professor, and jason etough, a PA i shadowed last year
-get a job as an orderly or another phleb job. i'll only be taking 13 credits so i'm hoping to have more time to get more medical hours

i keep thinking next semester won't be as busy, but maybe it will be anyway, if i'm tackling all these new things. it'll just be a different kind of busy. it's funny, i get busier every single year but never retract. i wonder if my capacity to get things done increases each year. does that mean i have a cap somewhere? or will it keep growing and growing? no, maybe i'll snap and go crazy at some point in the future. who knows...

tomorrow's my first plasma donation appointment. yes, i've stooped this low. selling my body for money. desperate times call for desperate measures, unfortunately. let's hope they actually take my blood this time.

time to keep studying that blasted chemistry! but just think, in one week i'll be COMPLETELY DONE with chemistry foreeeever unless they spring it on me in PA school but for some reason it won't be so bad then, or at least that's what i tell myself. anyway, holy, this is my last fall semester of undergrad ever. EVER. how strange...!!! how wonderful!!!!!!! i can't wait to graduate.

Sometimes my life feels so very unreal to me. I can't imagine myself in PA school. Yet it's finally here. It's finally the time to start thinking about applying, about living in a different state, doing something completely different. It's finally time to start being a real adult.

But it just doesn't seem real yet!

So far I've only got 2 schools that I for sure meet all the prerequisites for. There are a few maybes, and a lot that I could apply to if I am willing to take chem 106 and 107. Barf... I'm trying so hard to avoid those classes... I think I really hate chemistry. I love biology, anatomy, physiology... but chemistry? Nope, not for me.

And goodbye, Quinnipiac, one of my dream schools in the beautiful land of Connecticut. Why do you insist on requiring an organic chemistry lab? Tell me why... I promise you it won't make a better PA out of anyone! Goodbye lush green forests and sparkling blue waters...

Maybe I'm not ready for real life yet!!!

Although I don't think anyone ever is. You just go into it, scared crapless you may be. I mean, college never seemed real until I just did it. And this won't seem real until I just do it. Go Nike.

Man I can't wait for winter break this year... it's going to be gloriously fantastic. And Christmas! I'll get to talk to Jason! Oh heavens. I need to find time to mail him his shoes... too many things to do!

Ready... break!