a comet appears

I entered some photos into the Kennedy Center photo contest for all the students who went abroad the past school year. I got an honorable mention! Hundreds of photos are entered so it's pretty cool, plus my photo is hanging in the hallway of the Kennedy Center now for the rest of the year! You should check it out if you can...Here's the actual photo. I took it while we were hiking to Machu Picchu, at one of our little rest areas. His family lived in the shack that we stopped at; they sell water and gatorade and snacks to the hikers for their living. They had a bunch of guinea pigs inside too! Breeding them for dinner... so this kid was just chilling outside while we were resting so I snapped a pic of him. Wouldn't have done so if Kendal hadn't first.. so thanks to her!!

Random tidbit: They have glass gatorade/powerade bottles. Isn't that so weird? They were cool though. So refreshing.

it's not too late for love

I want someone to watch old romantic classics with.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OW-0kUUOHQA

finding a replacement with a heart serrated, i'll forget you --architecture in helsinki

I refuse to stay indoors today! My mom's coming home in a few hours and we are going to GO OUT. I couldn't be more excited-- finally! Civilization! Except that the whole city shuts down when it snows so I don't know if anyone will even be out... seriously, driving around, it's like a ghost town. Nobody is out. The roads are clear (but full of snow... haha badum ching) and nobody's out. There are a few people bundled up like the dickens hiking up the hills of Bellevue. That's about it. Crazy!

Until then, I've found some free piano sheet music online (got the idea from my cousin Ashley who has a bunch of Regina Spektor songs) so I'll play some piano before we leave. I haven't played, really played, in so long.. I'm excited. I've missed it.

Other than that, haven't really done much all break yet. But! I also haven't scheduled or written anything in my planner or set my alarm clock at all which is amazing, really. No lists! No schedules! It's incredible! (Yet I'm about to kind of schedule out the rest of my break right now... but hey, I lasted like 4 days which is pretty dang good for me.) I think maybe I should try to schedule my life less. Plan less. Just kind of write down what I have to do but not time it out exactly. Maybe life will be more enjoyable. Maybe? I should try it.

It was good to talk to Renee today. An hour and a half on the phone! We were always good at long phone chats, haha. It felt good to talk to someone who really understood what I'm going through, have gone through, etc. Way good. It's good to have good friends.

I'm listening to Architecture in Helsinki, a band I've forgotten about. I like them a lot. Kinda weird at first, but gooood stuff. Yup. Man. I really want to head to Half Price books and just browse for like hours. They have good books and music for cheap. So nice. And Pandora has introduced me to a bunch of great bands I want to get all the CDs for. I should do that sometime. If this effing snow ever clears up, ha.

tengo la camisa negra (juanes)

I am such a greaseball.

I really need to take a shower. But I just started my laundry. And I didn't have time to do laundry in Provo so I just brought it all home in plastic bags. Ha. So I need some clean panties and socks.. so I have to wait to shower.

So I'm this greasy gray mess (I'm wearing all grey sweats) sitting at the computer trying to finish my MBA final (halfway done! Eat that, Zimbabwe!) while listening to Spanish music on Pandora.

I finished translating which was great. I feel pretty accomplished, having translated an 8 page report on microcredit into Spanish. It just sounds cool to say. Ha. Even though it was a pucha to translate.

Being home is a little strange. Because it's so normal. I feel like I've been here forever. At the same time, I feel like I could drive a few minutes and get back to my apartment in Provo. Everything has blurred together so that it's not exciting or new to go anywhere anymore. How strange.

It was great seeing Caroline though! She and Jason came into the airport and stalked me while I was waiting for my baggage. We spazzed out screaming and such so everyone thought we were crazy so I made sure to say "It's been so freaking long! A year and 8 months!" so people knew why we were so ridiculously excited to see each other. Ha. She slept over last night, like old times, and I baked cookies, for the millionth time this month, and it was just a nice normal night.

Maybe since I'm still doing schoolwork it doesn't feel any different. It just feels like school still. (Ooo about a boy music just came on Pandora. Speaking of which I'm reading the book right now and it's hard to not play the movie in my head as I go along. It's good stuff. Also, it references "Groundhog Day" which is so funny b/c we all watched it last night b/c it was the only non-church movie in our house. Hahaha.) Maybe once I finish this final and start to play it really will feel like break, like I'm home. Yeah, that makes sense.

Jason's laptop is SO NICE. It's just an Acer, it was only like $400 but it is amazing. It's small, light, sleek, comfortable, I'm in love with it. I wish I could get the same one for the same price. But I think I have to hunt around for something else. I think I'm not going to get an HP anymore though b/c they are pretty heavy. But they look so pretty... haha. And I don't want a Dell b/c I hear of people having problems with them frequently... hum. What do you think? Leave me a comment, tell me what laptop you'd get.

So I haven't seen anybody yet. Haven't even seen Kacie and her fam yet b/c they live all the way in Fife. And oh yeah, how could I forget, it snowed buckets here so the roads are all crazy and dangerous. Plus we only have one working car for my whole family so I haven't gone anywhere for that reason too. But yeah it's so funny, Seattle never gets snow so the whole plowing the streets business? Doesn't happen. Seriously. I'll post a pic in a bit. It's so funny to me. And also silly and frustrating b/c everywhere is so hilly so I don't want to drive anywhere, I'm too scared. But yeah. Oh Seattle/Bellevue... shuts down when it gets snowy... hilarious.

And that's the break update for today. Back to Liberia, and how to help its new president fix her country.

may the force be with you

i love my dad. i got kind of mad at him yesterday because he last minute emailed to ask me to play flute on sunday at church and then again at the korean branch christmas party. i haven't played in over a year plus i was so stressed (still am) with finals i didn't want to think about embarrassing myself in front of a bunch of people-- ya feel me? anyways. so i explained how this week has been really crappy etc.. so he wrote back. and after a little pep spiel, he wrote, "May the force be with you!!! -Papa"

how cool is that? my dad is friggin sweet. he writes that a lot on his emails when he's trying to motivate us and stuff. i remember going on trek my first time when i was 14 and our parents wrote us letters that the "pony express" brought to us the third day or whatnot. and he totally made all these star wars analogies. i think i was leia and ted was luke and he was just talkin about the force and stuff. it was sooooo funny. and also touching so i probably cried. haha. he's pretty awesome.

más:
-interviewed 3 people for my internship. good stuff. i got sick of interviews at the end. it was a packed day though, which was nice. i like being busy at work.
-i'm taking home a bunch of books about guatemala. i get paid for reading and learning about it! i love my job.
-cleaned up my room. started packing. i think it's funny that every single year i've gone home for break i bring this huuuuge suitcase and can't fit anything and always worry about the weight and stuff. but this time i'm using the suitcase i went to bolivia with, which is a lot smaller. just knowing that i lived for 3 months off the things in that suitcase make me know i can live 2 1/2 weeks with the things in it again. haha. i used to be such an overpacker. side note: i am soooo grateful i packed light when i went to bolivia. it made everything SO much easier holy cow. and i really don't need much at all. silly silly.
-andrea's bridal shower was tonight. i was going to buy her a box of condoms to go with the "date night basket" jill and jessica put together. but i got nervous last second and didn't do it. good thing. nobody got her anything scandalous and she was like "you guys know me." phew. dodged that bullet. man, my bridal shower is going to be the most scandalicious thing ever. hahahaha
-i still have to finish that mba final. didn't even finish the zimbabwe question like i'd planned. pucha. but i think working on it over break won't be so bad. having more time, not being rushed, hopefully i'll be able to do better. and i'm starting not to care about grades anymore so maybe it's ok if i get a B in that class. i won't die, right?
-saw gabe at the testing center yesterday. she gave me good pep talks and convinced me not to die. that's a good thing. :) i'm feeling more pumped and motivated to let this year end with all of its awfulness and start fresh, a new leaf, a new chapter, however you want to call it! i'm ready to take on the world!!! ok not yet, but i will be after break. yeah!!!!! **anime pose of power/victory

that's it. this time tomorrow i'll be home. heck, in like 18 hours i'll be home. can't even believe it! oh man. merry christmas and happy new year everyone! be safe and RELAX and enjoy the break!!

bufandas

haha. that's just kinda funny. in an awful, twisted way.

cada vez que te busco te vas

I was just filling out a background check I have to do for my PA-shadowing internship class next semester (how awesome does that sound, by the way? I'm suuuuper excited, I miss hospitals/clinics) and I filled out the places I've lived in the past 7 years and it was 7 places. Crazy huh?? I know a lot of that is just moving at school but my family's moved back home every year since my first one here at BYU.

The house in Bellevue- GC.
Heritage Halls at BYU.
The house in Renton.
The Villa.
The house in Bellevue, the one we're in right now.
The Villa, different apt.
Bolivia.
Devere Court right now.

Crazy! I just thought it was kind of crazy.

tell me how i'm supposed to breathe with no air

**disclaimer: the subject has nothing to do with my entries. usually they're the song that's stuck in my head at the moment. just so you know.

So for my methods in health promotion class we've been watching these PBS series all semester about disparities and inequalities making people in America sick. It goes through racial barriers and how certain groups are unhealthy not from biological reasons but from inequality reasons that we've placed on them. This last episode was on Native Americans and how they have the highest rate of diabetes in the U.S. and how it's because we've exploited them and they live in poverty and have to rely on government handouts which end up just being junk food and canned food and how the nearest regular supermarket is an hour round trip away but is the only place with a good selection of fruits and vegetables and how there isn't anywhere to exercise, etc etc. So I thought it was a good episode, showed a lot of health disparities and how we need to legislate in those areas to get the neighborhoods cleaned up, build grocery stores closer by, etc. But this girl in my class, in my group just now, oh man..

She said she hated this last episode because she felt like she was just listening to people complain for 45 minutes. She said things like "I mean seriously? Stop complaining and go exercise. And they're all like 'There's nowhere to exercise' whatever they can exercise in their homes or whatever, you know?"

Seriously? Exercising in your home generally requires fitness equipment. Which generally requires a large sum of money. Which these people quite obviously don't have!!! How did she absolutely and completely miss the point of this episode, of this series, that there are health disparities for reasons such as poverty and how this inequality is making us sick. That's the point!! The point is they aren't like you, you silly little girl! They don't have money to spend on exercise equipment or the pounds of makeup you wear or expensive healthy foods or the nice clothes you have, the nice car you drive! That's why they're sick! Don't you get that?! They can't "just exercise inside". THAT'S THE POINT.

I don't know. It just riled me up. So I let it out through this. Some people. Some people just make me so...

maybe i will be fat and happy

I really really like food. No, really. In the sense that I associate it with happiness, with friends, fun, independence, all these random things. Whenever I picture myself doing something by myself it always involves food. Let me explain.

I love getting up early and getting some breakfast on my own, somewhere. Like the bakery down the street or the breakfast foods at the Cougareat. I love it! I don't know why. I loved it in Bolivia too, getting street food all the time. I think it's because it makes me feel like I'm a city girl, living in some big city where nobody makes food but they always just get it somewhere. On the go. I don't know why, but it just seems glamorous for me. You all know that I can't get up in the morning early, at least I avoid it as much as possible. But if there's food involved, I will get up. No doubt about it. What is it about food??

And concerning going out with friends, hanging out. Food is always involved, no ve? And I love trying new restaurants, new types of food. It's so.. fun!

It just makes me happy. It tastes delicious. It's an enjoyable experience. So I hate hate hate that I feel like I have to be super super thin to be attractive or happy or desirable or whatever. Because even if I ate more, I'd still be healthy. I don't think I'd be terribly overweight or at more risk for heart disease or anything. But I wouldn't be stick thin (not that I am right now anyway) or have a flat stomach or whatever or whatever. And that irritates me to no end. I go through phases of caring, then not caring and eating whatever I want, then feeling super fat and unattractive and caring again, etc. It goes on and on. I don't want to care anymore!! I want to eat what I want, healthily, but maybe more than the average supermodel or BYU female college student. I want to experience food and all the enjoyment that comes out of it! I love food! Why should I suppress that love??

Because I'm going to get fat and feel ugly that's why. Blah.