I got so many interesting and good responses and it's on my mind again so I figured, why not write about it?
This time I'm wondering how you can love without fear. It's always in songs and stories--
"I read with every broken heart we should become more adventurous," for example.
People apparently are supposed to love without fear of getting hurt, fear of scaring the other person, coming on too strong, etc. But these are valid things and I think you should take into account what the other person is ready for.
But at the same time, I want to be like these people in the songs and the stories! I want my heart to have the capacity to love that much! To love without holding anything back. To stop being afraid, to just love and love and love without being afraid of what could happen in the future or fear of getting your heart broken. I want to be like that!!! I want to be like Buddy the Elf: "I'm in love, I'm in love and I don't care who knows it!"
But it's so hard.. not to mention you have to watch what you do and say so you don't scare the other person. And in order to keep a clear and logical head maybe you have to put away such feelings. Maybe? Maybe not?
And I hate all the games that people play regarding love and affection. So many times it really does feel like some sort of chase. That if you give too much, they won't like you as much, because there's nothing to fight for or chase, it's just all being given to them, and that either turns them off or freaks them out. So then you back off a bit and then wham they're back in. And it's just this awful see-saw game of stupid. This happens when you're trying to date someone for the first time too, you play this dumb game of leaving them wanting. Well why do you have to do that in the first place?? Why can't you just put everything out there. Bleah. Ha. I feel so bitter right now.
Anyways. I had more thoughts but I can't remember them anymore. So we'll leave this at that.
3 comments:
i know for some people those kinds of games are fun. i don't know how common movie-love is because i guess you need to be those characters, too, and who is really like a movie character? unless the movie is really well-written and portrays realistic characters. and in those movies love definitely always sucks, haha. i think, if you give fearless love, you will receive fearless love in return. who would not want to return fearless love? if it's not returned, then i guess that person doesn't know how to love yet, and who is going to wait around for that. speaking of love. have you seen the movie "once"? you would like it.
Jean-your last paragraph is EXACTLY what I think. I HATE the seasaw game. Hate it. I'm more the type to just lay it out there and be upfront and honest. Saves a lot guessing too, and I do not enjoy guessing what the guys is thinking or feeling. Great post again!
Kacie-loved your comment!
Well, being a man, I can tell you I was terrified all the time when I was dating. You just have to be patient. I think the fear ends... well... when you're married really.
: /
Love definitely sucks in that regard.
I think I know what you mean about the games. I don't really know how to answer that one, though. : ( I don't think I played games like that.
I think it mostly has to do with BYU boys. It's just too easy for them. The guy-girl ratio is too advantageous for them.
But the games thing happens to boys I know too...
People just suck I guess...
Hang in there Jean. Someday you'll find a boy who is nice to you and isn't a complete moron. You'll probably have to fight to get him, but it'll be way worth it in the end.
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